Showing results by narrator "Tor Thom" in Comedy & Humor

What do ice cream and Sadie Montgomery have in common? They're both ice cold, but one taste is never enough. I wanted to be friends - I would have even settled for her seeing me as anything but a nerd - but there was no getting through. So just like any hard-headed, red-blooded man out there, I made up my mind. I'd make my coworker fall for me.

Ben Riggs says he loves me. He says he hasn't stopped thinking about me since he broke my heart and chased me out of town all those years ago. I say, liar liar pants on fire. And boy, do those bright yellow, flame-resistant fireman pants look good on him. I'm aching to feel those big, rough hands clenching on my hips and to collect on the illicit promises burning in his dark blue eyes. Self-control goes up in flames every time he flashes that arrogant smile. So I give in - because a woman has needs. (Am I right, ladies?) He can have my body, but my heart is off-limits.

I probably didn't make a great first impression. Rushing through his apartment door - practically naked aside from the plastic shower cap on my head - and charging for his bathroom as if my skin was on fire. What was I supposed to do? Wait around for a white knight to swoop through my bathroom window with a wrench and a toilet plunger to save me from my faulty plumbing situation? Insert eye roll here. Anyway, that's the story of how I met my new landlord.

I see dead people. No, not like that movie. I’m a coroner, and yes it's the kiss of death on my dating life. When men find out what I do, I'm lucky to hear, “It was nice meeting you”. Until I almost accidentally kill Blake Hale with my car. Instead of being freaked out by me, he’s intrigued. No matter how much I try to scare him off, he keeps coming back for more. And for a follow-the-rules guy, he’s breaking them all for me.