Armageddon: The Musical
Armageddon Trilogy, Book 1
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Narrated by:
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Robert Rankin
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By:
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Robert Rankin
About this listen
From the point of view of 2050, you're history. Theological warfare. Elvis on an epic time-travel journey - the Presliad. Buddhavision - a network bigger than God (and more powerful, too). Nasty nuclear leftovers. Naughty sex habits. Dalai Dan (the 153rd reincarnation of the Lama of that ilk) and Barry, the talkative Time Sprout.
Even with all this excitement, you wouldn't think a backwater planet like Earth makes much of a splash in the galatic pond. But the soap opera called The Earthers is making big video bucks in the intergalactic ratings race. And alien TV execs know exactly what the old earth drama needs to make the off-world audience sit up and stare: a spectacular Armageddon-type finale. With a cast of millions - including you! Don’t touch that dial - it’s gonne be one helluva show…
Robert Rankin describes himself as a teller of tall tales. The Morning Star describes him as 'The Master of Silliness', and his publisher describes him as ‘The Master of Far Fetched Fiction’. He is the author of more than thirty novels, of which he has sold millions of copies, and he makes people laugh around the world.
Robert loves going on tour, signing books for readers, and his appearances at signings and conventions are legendary, often including a stand-up routine, a song (accompanied by his 'air-ukulele'), and an always-entertaining question-and-answer session.
©1990 Robert Rankin (P)2013 Audible LtdListeners also enjoyed...
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Editorial reviews
A weird and wonderful romp through the galaxy in the grand tradition of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett. The plot involves multiple worlds and dimensions, a post-apocalyptic Earth, a religious leader named Dalai Lama Dan, Elvis (with a talking sprout embedded in his brain), and plenty of commentary on religion, television, and pop culture. Performed by author Robert Rankin himself in a warm English accent, and stuffed with laugh-out-loud humor. Some might find the plot a bit complex, although plenty of others will enjoy the wackiness and touches of true comic brilliance.
Critic reviews
“He becomes funnier the more you read him� ( Independent)
“Everybody should read at least one Robert Rankin in their life� ( Daily Express)
“One of the rare guys who can always make me laugh� (Terry Pratchett)
“To the top-selling ranks of humorists such as Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, let us welcome Mr Rankin� (Tom Hutchinson, The Times)
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Story
Niblock House is a rising executive at General Technics, one of a few all-powerful corporations. His work is leading General Technics to the forefront of global domination, both in the marketplace and politically - it's about to take over a country in Africa. Donald Hogan is his roommate, a seemingly sheepish bookworm. But Hogan is a spy, and he's about to discover a breakthrough in genetic engineering that will change the world...and kill him. Society is squeezed into hive-living madness by god-like mega computers and mass-marketed psychedelic drugs.
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perfect audio experience
- By Darryl on 03-24-14
By: John Brunner, and others
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Superheroes
- By: Peter S. Beagle, Daryl Gregory, James Patrick Kelly, and others
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman, Joe Barrett, Christina Delaine, and others
- Length: 17 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Modern gods and goddesses, remote, revered - and like the pantheon of heroes and heroines of ancient myth - possessing great power tempered with flaws. Now, find within this anthology great tales by gifted and award-winning authors who move superheroes from the four-color panels of comic books to the fantastic pages of fiction, stories that will remind anyone who ever wanted to wear a cape or don a cowl of the extraordinary powers of the imagination!
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Pretentious tired old concepts
- By BookofJoy on 12-29-14
By: Peter S. Beagle, and others
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Cold City
- Repairman Jack: Early Years Trilogy, Book 1
- By: F. Paul Wilson
- Narrated by: Alexander Cendese
- Length: 11 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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If you've never read a Repairman Jack novel, this is the place to begin. It's 1990. A twenty-one-year-old named Jack has dropped out of college, leaving his old life behind to build a new one in New York City. Manhattan's rough edges are jagged enough to shred any unwary newcomer, but perhaps not one who is determined to stay off the grid, at any cost, in the busiest metropolis on earth. And to do so, he'll have to take jobs of a less than legal nature.
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Fun, as long you don't think too much
- By Andrew Pollack on 01-17-14
By: F. Paul Wilson
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Others
- By: James Herbert
- Narrated by: Kris Dyer
- Length: 17 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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The ugly truth. Nicholas Dismas is a Private Investigator, but like no other that has gone before him. He carries a secret to which not even he has the answer. Dismas is hired to find a missing baby. One that was taken away at birth... Or was it? His investigation takes him to a mysteriously located place called Perfect Rest, a nursing home for the elderly. Here Dismas will discover the dark secret of the Others. And in an astonishing and spectacular finale he will resolve the enigma of his own existence.
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Good book
- By Joy on 06-26-18
By: James Herbert
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Requiem for a Ruler of Worlds
- The First Adventure of Alacrity Fitzhugh & Hobart Floyt
- By: Brian Daley
- Narrated by: Brian Holsopple
- Length: 9 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Mankind was beginning its third leap into the Galaxy, but Old Earth had so long kept to herself that her people were unable to travel safely among the rough-and-tumble cultures that had evolved on distant worlds. That annoyed Earth's rulers, for Hobart Floyt--a minor Terran bureaucrat-- had been left a mysterious inheritance by the deceased ruler of a small but wealthy interstellar empire.
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Best Sci Fi Fun anywhere!
- By A. Foxter on 07-07-15
By: Brian Daley
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The Astounding, the Amazing, and the Unknown
- A Novel
- By: Paul Malmont
- Narrated by: Christopher Lane
- Length: 16 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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In 1943, when the United States learns that Germany is on the verge of a deadly innovation that could tip the balance of the war, the government turns to an unlikely source for help: the nation’s top science fiction writers. Installed at a covert military lab within the Philadelphia Naval Yard are the most brilliant of these young visionaries. The unruly band is led by Robert Heinlein, the dashing and complicated master of the genre. His “Kamikaze Group,� is tasked with transforming the wonders of science fiction into science fact....
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Pulp Perfection!
- By Jim N on 08-31-12
By: Paul Malmont
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Firstborn
- StarCraft: The Dark Templar Saga, Book 1
- By: Christie Golden
- Narrated by: Christie Golden
- Length: 10 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Jake Ramsey - an unassuming yet talented archaeologist - has been given the chance of a lifetime. Hired to investigate a recently unearthed Xel'Naga temple, he knows this latest assignment will open up whole new possibilities for his career. Yet when Jake discovers the remains of a long-dead protoss mystic, his hopes and dreams are irrevocably drowned in a flood of alien memories. Bonded to the spirit of the dead protoss, Jake has become the sole inheritor of the protoss' total history - every event, every thought - every feeling.
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Christie Golden doesn't have a wide enough range
- By Chad Dye on 04-30-19
By: Christie Golden
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Doughnut
- By: Tom Holt
- Narrated by: Ray Sawyer
- Length: 13 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Things have been going pretty badly for Theo Bernstein. An unfortunate accident at work has lost him his job (and his work involved a Very Very Large Hadron Collider, so he's unlikely to get it back). His wife has left him. And he doesn't have any money. Before Theo has time to fully appreciate the pointlessness of his own miserable existence, news arrives that his good friend, a renowned physicist and Nobel laureate, has died. By leaving the apparently worthless contents of his safety deposit box to Theo, however, the professor has set him on a quest of epic proportions.
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A fun world for scifantasy fans
- By illgnosis on 06-19-13
By: Tom Holt
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Dead Man's Land
- By: Robert Ryan
- Narrated by: Richard Burnip
- Length: 14 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Deep in the trenches of Flanders Fields, men are dying in the thousands every day. So one more death shouldn't be a surprise. But then a body turns up with bizarre injuries, and Sherlock Holmes' former sidekick, Dr. John Watson - unable to fight for his country due to injury but able to serve it through his medical expertise - finds his suspicions raised.
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Watson is wonderful, amid very grim surroundings
- By L. Gutman on 03-01-18
By: Robert Ryan
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The Bayern Agenda
- Galactic Cold War, Book 1
- By: Dan Moren
- Narrated by: Victor Bevine
- Length: 10 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Simon Kovalic, top intelligence operative for the Commonwealth of Independent Systems, is on the front line of the burgeoning Cold War with the aggressive Illyrican Empire. He barely escapes his latest mission with a broken arm and vital intel that points to the empire cozying up to the Bayern Corporation: a planet-sized bank. There’s no time to waste, but with Kovalic out of action, his undercover team is handed over to his ex-wife, Lt. Commander Natalie Taylor.
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tedious
- By itinerant on 03-09-19
By: Dan Moren
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The Punch Escrow
- By: Tal M. Klein
- Narrated by: Matthew Mercer
- Length: 8 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Joel Byram is an everyday 22nd century guy. He spends his days training artificial-intelligence engines to act more human, jamming out to 1980s new wave - an extremely obscure genre - and trying to salvage his deteriorating marriage. Joel is pretty much an everyday guy with everyday problems - until he's accidentally duplicated while teleporting. Now Joel must outsmart the shadowy organization that controls teleportation, outrun the religious sect out to destroy it, and find a way to get back to the woman he loves.
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Great Premise, terrible execution
- By Perfect Tommy on 09-25-17
By: Tal M. Klein
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Dark Run
- Keiko, Book 1
- By: Mike Brooks
- Narrated by: Damian Lynch
- Length: 11 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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The Keiko is a ship of smugglers, soldiers of fortune and adventurers, travelling Earth's colony planets, searching for the next job. And nobody talks about their past. But when a face from Captain Ichabod Drift's former life sends them on a run to Old Earth, all the rules change. Trust will be broken, and blood will be spilled.
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Fun sf in a familiar setting *cough Firefly cough*
- By John on 06-12-16
By: Mike Brooks
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Astro-Nuts
- By: Logan J. Hunder
- Narrated by: Christopher Lane
- Length: 10 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Never meddle with unidentified spying objects...The year is: The Future. Mars and Earth are like that divorced couple who don’t exactly like each other but have at least stopped fighting in public. Floating somewhere in between them, amid all the garbage and Gene Roddenberry’s ashes, a transport vessel called the SS Jefferson is homeward bound. Its crew might have even made it on time for once, too...
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Gave up at 1hr and 33 minutes
- By Moondog on 11-28-19
By: Logan J. Hunder
What listeners say about Armageddon: The Musical
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Anthony
- 05-23-23
Some of the best author-read books
Robert Rankin’s books are in some ways, a bit old-school and dated, but in other ways, the subjects and the humor are completely on point for today, and he does a great job of humorously reading his own work.
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- Amazon Customer
- 09-17-16
I Couldn't Finish It
What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?
I don't think this is salvageable in that way. I got to 3:48/10:15 and had to quit. And I have listened to some crap all the way to the end out of my compulsion to completionism.
What could Robert Rankin have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?
I'm American, and while I listen to a decent number of British audiobooks and watch a smattering of British television, the amount of British colloquialisms and slang (as well as their narrated delivery) was off-putting to me with its unfamiliarity. I may be too ignorant of whatever dialect Rankin was using, and possibly a British audience would respond better to it. It was like fingernails on a chalkboard over here.
The plot was... nonsense. Not fun Terry Pratchett-heartwarming-nonsense. Not zany everything's-game-Douglas Adams nonsense. Just ridiculous. It was a running commentary on TV viewing for fun and profit and the decline of humanity. It got old, and I didn't even make it to the end. Of course, this is a bigger issue than the dialect choice. The dialect just turned me off first.
What do you think the narrator could have done better?
He's terrible with the female characters. I'm pretty sure there were two female characters. In the narrator's defense, they were pretty poorly written to begin with... oh, wait...
What character would you cut from Armageddon: The Musical?
They seemed to be cutting themselves efficiently enough... Geez... Elvis. I'd cut Elvis. What the hell was Elvis doing in there in the first place? I will certainly never know--I'm not going back to find out. Also, Elvis was an actual human being. Something about putting a real human into your nonsense alien apocalypse cannibal television story doesn't sit well.
Any additional comments?
Ugh.
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3 people found this helpful